Can I, Should I

The Black Canyon Trail Ultra 100Km was held this past weekend in spite of a 2-hour delay caused by snow that accumulated overnight. By the time my wave of runners toed the starting line, hundreds of runners ahead had turned the snow-covered dirt and rock trail into an inches-deep muddy mess covering the first seven miles of the 62 mile course. This notoriously difficult ultra race became brutal, literally at the starting line.

My crew chief was clear and direct with me at the first checkpoint, 20 miles into the race. Miles of running on thick mud required much more effort to maintain a pace close to target, I had consumed less than half of my planned hydration, and I was not responding well to my solid food, so I had some significant adjustments to make before the next checkpoint.

I came into the next checkpoint at about mile 32 at sunset. I did not consume any of my planned solids since the first checkpoint and was not able to do so going forward. My hydration was still running about 50% behind plan. All layers of clothing were soaked from sweat and cold water, with more river crossings and colder temperatures ahead. Setting out to finish the race would mean another 8 hours through terrain much more difficult than in the first half of the race. It was time to channel my inner Goggins, or so I thought.

I spent time regaining my focus by sitting quietly away from most of my crew and family who had come to cheer me. A clear decision emerged when I consciously shifted my thinking from how I could complete the task ahead to whether I should do so in the first place. It was time to earn the very first DNF (Did Not Finish) of my running journey.

—> How do you know when the question shouldn’t be whether you can but whether you should do something?

—> What objective criteria are you accountable to that will tell you which side of the equation you are on?

—> Who is the person in your life that knows and loves you and who will look you in the eye with a frank assessment?